“I don’t know why they are doing it that way. That is just so messed up. That’s just gay.”
That statement may seem innocuous to some people, but it bothers me, especially when I have to hear it repeatedly. The statement says the “gay” is synonymous with screwed up, wrong, and bad. Remember when gay was another word for happy?
Now, think about what people who would make that opening statement think about gays. I think about it. And I don’t think they hold much, if any, respect for them. And since I am gay, I don’t think they hold much respect for me. And they don’t know me.
My usual comment is, “You say that like it’s a bad thing.” It puts them on notice and makes them think about their word choices without sounding too bitchy.
I know my friends who just happen to be gay experience injustices like this all the time. If an inappropriate racial slur were uttered, then someone might likely get fired over it. An insult to gays is overlooked and I find that very unfortunate. Perhaps it is each of our jobs to enlighten the unenlightened, which will be helpful when they discover that they are related to someone who just happens to be gay.
Like Mel, a witty reply is always best to defuse the comment: Oh, and you seem to speak from experience on this gayness thing.
Of course, I’m no better. I’ve taken to say that something is “SOOOO metrosexual”. Is that a bad thing?
I know what you mean, that really bothers me too.
I also was taken aback when they changed the words to “I Feel Pretty” from the word gay to the word bright. Was the word gay really that bad to be taken out of the classic song and filled in with another.
I don’t know, for now on maybe I’ll say, “eww that’s so straight” whenever I see something I don’t fancy.
People are so stupid and intolerant.
That’s one of my pet peeves and I don’t find it innocuous at all. I’ve tried to combat this by using the word whenever I’m happy. I’m not sure if this is the right way to address the problem but I hope it helps.